cant get myself to slp..

its now already 5.35am.... and i still cant force myself to slp.... each time i close my eyes i keep seeing images and scenes which i so do not wan them to happen... im scared.. im feelin sad.... im feeling bad about myself..

i feel so lost... keep making mistakes.. keep doing stupid things.... keep avoiding things.....

it all happened so fast... one moment everything was so nice and perfect.. suddenly the next.... it felt as if it was the end of the world for me.... this feeling.. this feeling really feels so bad... feels like u cant breath... feels like u are falling off a cliff without anything to cling on to.. it feels like ur surroundings all became black and white...

im really sry for wad i did... i probably said this like 999 times... but im really sorry... cant find any other words to express my feelings.. feel like punching myself... y the fuck am i so dumb.... my heart really hurts alot rite now... alot of mix emotions.. alot of deep thoughts... alot of flashing images of wad may happen going thru my head....

thinking too much? maybe.... i dunno....